20th February. The Top Ten

A poll is currently under way at BIRDGUIDES asking for us to vote the top ten British rarities of the last 50 years. The list has some glaring omissions on it such as Great Knot, Tree Swallow and Yellow Throated Vireo etc etc. Whilst I'm sure that there must be some validity in this survey I cannot feel that some birds really don't deserve a place on there for example birds such as Pied-billed Grebe and that f'ing disfigured Curlew in the Northeast.

A thought has occurred to me. What about the other end of the scale the crappiest birds on the British List? I've created a list of 15 rare or non-native species below which in my opinion are shit. To qualify as shit they must be either Crap looking,spurious, plastic or not on my list (which is why that bloody Bee-eater is there). This list is not final and I am open to further suggestions.

BLACK DUCK POSSIBLY THE SECOND MOST BORING RARITY ON THE BRITISH LIST
DOUBLE CRESTED CORMORANT WITHOUT A DOUBT THE WORST LOOKING RARITY ON THE
BRITISH LIST AT THE WORST LOOKING LOCATION
COLLARED DOVE WELL THEY'RE JUST SHIT
BLACK SCOTER MUTANT
GOLDEN PHEASANT PLASTIC FANTASTIC
LADY AMHERST'S PHEASANT TICK EM WHEREVER YOU WANT THEY'RE ALL CRAP
RING-NECKED PARAKEET THE FLYING TREE RAT OF THE SOUTH
AMERICAN HERRING GULL WHO REALLY CARES
BLUE-CHEEKED BEE-EATER I HATE THESE BASTARDS
GREY CATBIRD MASS HALLUCINATION ON A NORTH WALES HILLSIDE
FAN-TAILED WARBLER SEE COLLARED DOVE
IBERIAN CHIFFCHAFF TOO MANY OCCURRENCES FOR MY LIKING
ROCK SPARROW YEH RIGHT
SCOTTISH CROSSBILL HANDS UP THOSE OF US WHO CAN HONESTLY SAY THEY'VE SEEN ONE
BAY-BREASTED WARBLER THE NEW AGE EQUIVALENT OF THE HASTING RARITIES

At the request of others

Pallid Swift Dull as dish water
Semi-palmated Plover A Ringed Plover for the over educated.

8 comments:

Alan Tilmouth said...

In 2000 years that f'ing Curlew will have become a new religion it's been denounced that much.
Take it its not on your list?

I'd add Pallid Swift to your list, dull,dull,dull.

Mark said...

No I couldn't get for it Alan as I was off to Cyprus with my ex wife. Now if only I'd had a crystal ball.

Take your point about Pallid Swift though.

Thing said...

It'll have to be the Curlew - but Blyth's Reed Warbler left me singularly unimpressed. Actually most warblers...

Anonymous said...

Rock Sparrow eh? That might get one or two spitting feathers...

Total crock of shit IMHO. Boring and spurious.

I must say Black Ducks never fail to disappoint.

Mark said...

John. The Yorkshire finder does at least have a sense of humour.

Tao Birder said...

White-throated Needletail, total pants...

joking

Tyrannosaurus Rex Harrison Ford said...

'BAY-BREASTED WARBLER THE NEW AGE EQUIVALENT OF THE HASTING RARITIES'. What makes you say that? I think the video is pretty indisputable. The finder certainly had a bit of previous...but I think the BBW was gen. Lucky bastard.

Mark said...

T-Rex. There were some unsubstantiated mumblings about this one whilst on Shetland last Autumn regarding the authenticity of the video, though we might have been drunk or had an iffy Chicken and Mushroom Pie.